Dear political people,
calling that whole region Asia Pacific was a really good joke to begin with.
Australia's the only APAC state that managed to wear a hoodie and sunglasses throughout all these years. Their kill is silent. But the yellow race is such a madcap; these North Koreans, they kill like hyenas and make a coordinated show out of it too. They howl and wail and brag but in the end they're still starving. The last red army on the planet both softens my heart and boggles my mind.
A personal theory regarding this fetus international conflict is that the dear leader was sick n' all, hallucinating, you know, and since that's something that could easily piss off anyone, in a moment of nauseated drowsiness he pushed the nuclear attack red fucking button (only apparently he got it confused with another one since he only managed to delifen two sailors). While doing this he probably said something like 'all your sea base are belong to me'. He thought he flippin' owned them. The only thing he did own was fish in the water.(Get it, the sea bass? Yeah.)
So what I think is that Apple should sponsor the US Army with about 20 million Iphones and then the army should drop them all over NK and install a bigass satellite and give free internet access to everyone. That should stop the famine and the controlled ignorance. It'll be like that scene in Soylent Green, when the old guy gets to see tapes with green grass and flowers and deer and shit before getting chopped up, wrapped and fed to his neighbors. Mass hysteria is definitely the best tactical move.
Yours truly,
An ignoramus who comments beneath 'serious' articles
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